Monday, 25 January 2016

Navigation of life.

Today, after 5 long years, I am again married. He is not the man I love. I have loved once and probably never will again. This marriage is just for Ayushi's sake. She is to young to understand what has happened to her father. When I was only three months pregnant with her than came to know Major Akshay Singh has sacrificed his life for his motherland. Since then, I never tried for another but Mom and Dad wanted me to get married again.

Dad, one day declared that he has selected a man for me. He is Doctor by profession. From what I have learnt about him from Dad, we are in the same boat. His wife died after two years of marriage due to Cancer leaving a boy after her.

Is our marriage really a marriage?? What are we doing? I look at the door, he entered awkwardly holding his three year old boy. He tried making small talks with me and asked his son to take Ayushi with him for playing. They both were all giggles and smiles. But I was remember my first meeting with Akshay. Coy glaces and flirtatious talks. Hr is nothing like him. He is just a mess. Akshay was so handsome and knows how to impress a girl but he is not at all like him.

We are only two lonely lovesick strangers looking for love another time. So what if we don't love each other? Is it wrong for me to seek love from others when I have been forsaken by the one I love. The most fortunate ones live together for their whole life. The rest of us like me cannot afford to choose and consider ourselves fortunate to find any love at all.

I look into his eyes . He look into mine and quickly lower our gaze and start fidgeting with spoon on Dinner table. I tried to smile but could not. Then he started talking about weather, our favorite places, foods, books, authors, movies, dreams, fears and aspirations. I too enjoyed participating and being a part of his conversation.

Ayushi, seems to like him and so do he. Both were comfortable with each other. It was not look like both are meeting each other for the first time. I enjoyed their familiarity and comfortably with each other. Though different from Akshay but he seems to be a good man. I think I have not made any wrong decision and may be what I was lacking in my life, this navigation will give that happiness to me and most importantly to my little angel. I felt relieved as the dark night of loneliness seem to come to an end..




This blog post is inspired by the blogging marathon hosted on IndiBlogger for the launch of the #Fantastico Zica from Tata Motors. You can apply for a test drive of the hatchback Zica today.