Thursday, 4 February 2016

Broken heart- impact on me.

They are the mere creative stories written for the contest, nothing is related to my or anyone's real life

I still remember the day, he went away. He said I am no longer excites him. He doesn't talk about the love. Just the excitement. But I loved him truly. Four years and he was the only one I was dreaming of. I failed in my exams just because he was not well and I have to take care of him and he forget everything. That nothing lasts forever, was proved the day he had left me, hanging midway, crying at my own fate.

To be very honest, it hurt a lot, initially. I was completely broke. Nothing could make me happy. It looks as if I had lost my life. I used to lie down on my bed pretending to be sick when all I wanted actually, was to cry the whole day. I didn’t feel like talking to anyone, and now I realize how exasperating it’d been on their end (sigh!). I rarely ate, or left my place; I skipped routine like a sloth waiting for that phase to pass but time stood still for me.

Though I tried hard to divert my mind, desperately searching for an escape and for a change, at certain intervals, got up for my classes, though I never felt like dressing up or even combing my hair sometimes, which would effortlessly grab me the unwanted attention and awkward glances, but I barely cared.

At times I could not control myself and tried to message him but stopped helplessly as I saw his pics on Facebook with his new girlfriend. Searching his Facebook profile is like my routine. He has also changed his password which means he longer wants me in his life. Without him my mind used to wander a lot, aimlessly and uselessly. I used to connect the thoughts, one by one, ultimately reaching him, and forcefully declaring myself the reason of the unpleasant circumstances.

Somehow the day pass but as soon as dusk arrive, so would the ghosts inside my head. I keep blaming myself as the reason fro all ill. I pray to God for some miracle to happen but nothing seems to help. My mornings were pale, dark eyes and twisted heads. I was entering into abyss of depression. I had no strength left.
One day, I fainted on road like a beggar. No one was there to take care of me. People stopped by but  helped me. some commented on me as a druggist or looser. That’s exactly when I realized, I was not the same person anymore. The so-called-love I had inside me, had not only vanished but also sucked up the remaining emotions off me. This wasn’t appreciable. Something needed to be changed. Perhaps, something inside me.
Finally something struck a chord inside and I realized that apparently, it was high time for introspection. “I need to focus all my energy towards myself. One cannot sit crying over the same reason forever, because, there’s a lot to do, literally,” I told myself repeatedly, again and again till that was all that went through my mind.

I decided to give all my attention to my career, which is off course, my priority right now. I dressed and went for my college with new aims and high inspirations. 
This blog post is inspired by the blogging marathon hosted on IndiBlogger for the launch of the #Fantastico Zica from Tata Motors. You can apply for a test drive of the hatchback Zica today.